Nov/Dec 2018

Nov/Dec 2018 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Gregory, Olympia, Washington, USA

“Call me a ‘fly on the wall’, did you?”
– McKay Manners, Paderborn, Germany

“I’ve been trying to contact web support for TWO HOURS now!”
– Stephanie, Pakenham, Victoria, Australia

 “I’m not on the phone, I’m ON your phone.”
– Henry Gutman, San Jose, California, USA

 “Will you keep it down?!  You’re gonna wake the 200 eggs I laid in the ear….  Oh, too late.”
– Brian Eirik Coe, Lake Stevens, Washington, USA

“Who do you think connects you to the World Wide Web?”
– Lynne Lumsden Green, Springfield, Queensland, Austalia

“I said:  I’m right HERE!”
– Rob Wood, Louisville Kentucky, USA

“Ladder? No, I said I’ve got a very weak…”
– Jenner

Aug/Oct 2018

Aug/Oct 2018 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Jonathan, Bairnsdale, Victoria, Australia
“Keep it off the ground for HOW LONG?!”
 – Dave Neil, Idaho Falls, Idaho, USA
“Breaking news – Bigfoot hoaxer traced to Australia”
 – Valerie Falconer, Penarth, Wales
“I just flew in from next door, and boy are my wings tired.”
 – Henry Gutman, San Jose, California, USA
“I can’t wait for the Cast Party!“
 – John the Wysard, Parma, Idaho, USA
“You could’ve been more detailed about explaining “might experience water retention”!”
 – Josh Harrington Knight, Midland, Texas, USA
“There MUST be some other treatment for carpal talon!?”
 – Bruce Denhard, New Hampshire, USA
“Why didn’t I opt in for the flight insurance?!”
 – Jamie White, Long Crendon, Bucks, UK
“I’m glad they didn’t find my broken wishbone”
 – Jenner
Jan/Jul 2018

Jan/Jul 2018 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Joe Kesselman, Arlington, Massachusetts, USA
“I think someone’s trying to tickle my appetite.”
– Rob Falconer, Llandough, Wales, UK
“Yes, I know you’re not enthusiastic about continuing your hemodynamometry on the treadmill, but I got that covered.”
– Jochen Bern, from Germany
“It does appear that you have “white feather” syndrome.”
– Tracey Yothers, DeSoto, Texas, USA
“I didn’t realize the stress test was going to be this difficult!”
– Wayne Cook, Michigan, USA
“Colonel Sanders goes fox hunting.”
– M Henry, Reidsville NC USA
 “Pressure down.” 
– Jenner
Oct/Dec 2017

Oct/Dec 2017 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Roger Chittock, Stoke-on-Trent, England, UK
“Someone on the Internet is WRONG!  I MUST correct them!”
– Niall Shapero, Los Angeles, California, USA
“Oh cluck, my computer’s hard boiled!”
– Gildedtongue, Conway, New Hampshire, USA
“FUBAR – Fowled Up Beyond All Recognition.”
– Jim Hayden
“The worst part of turning the Doc’s chicken scratch into computer files, is that I can only do hunt-and-peck.”
– Abel DuSable, Winnipeg Manitoba, Canada
“No wonder it’s Twitter. Those aren’t tweets; they’re twits!”
– Josh H. Knight
“What? The best cure for a cold is chicken soup?!”
– Christian Hennecke, Bochum, Germany
“Weird… I googled “hot chicks” but not one picture of an incubator has come up!”
– Lee Toop, Port Coquitlam, BC, Canada
 “Maybe I shouldn’t have entered ‘Chicks’ into my search engine”
– Rob Falconer, Llandough, Wales, UK
“Now THAT looks finger lickin’ good!”
– Wolfgang Bylsma, Perth, WA, Australia
 “OMG!!!  So THAT’S where eggs come from!”
– Jim Lane, Holly Springs, Mississippi, USA
 “So THAT’S what came first..?  MUM lied to me!!!”
– Alun Rundle, Newport, Wales
“Oh My, I’ve never seen such fowl language!”
– Craig Westlake, Ossian, Ohio, USA
“These aren’t hen ties!!”
– PunkTiger New Bedford, Massachusetts, USA
 “That’s not CORN!”
– Robin Barr, Port Richey, Florida, USA
– William Knudson, Bismarck, North Dakota, USA
 “Oh no! I just deleted the entire internet!! Mum’s going to be so mad at me…”
– Mick Dwyer, Tumbarumba, NSW, Australia (NSW is New South Wales, not…)
 “It’s…The full moulty!”
– Jenner
Jul/Sep 2017

Jul/Sep 2017 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Henry Gutman, San Jose, California, USA
“Try our deep-fried lardburgers. You’ll never go back to anything else… (Of course, you won’t be able to go forward either, but still…)” 
– Jed Martinez, Margate, Florida, USA
If you super size your order, you’ll get a free prescription for Lipitor or Crestor!
– Josh Harrington Knight
“Better the devil you know from the Devil you know.”
– Mark Powell, Tacoma, Washington, USA
“Hasty Taste: Good To The Last Glop!”
– Mitch Marmel
“Now with 20% less people.”
– Jeffrey Angus, Ranger, Texas, USA
“…and best of all, it’s no one you know.”
– Tristan MacAvery, Syracuse, New York, USA
“We had to have 1,000 caps reprinted after someone put an N instead of the H.”
– Valerie Falconer, Penarth , Wales
“Don’t you just love the little burger?”
– Jenner
May/Jun 2017

May/Jun 2017 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Alun Rundle, Newport, South Wales, UK
“Inhaler.  Outhaler. Inhaler. Outhaler. Inhaler. Outhaler.”
– M Henry, Reidsville, North Carolina, USA
“Handy for Formoterol as well as Formicidae!”  Too esoteric maybe?
– Dave Neil
(Esoteric? No, it’s Jarrad. –Jenner)
“Well, it was cheaper than a Fitbit”
– Rob Falconer, Llandough, Penarth, Wales, UK
“But, for a really long marathon, I find I need nitrous oxide”
– Valerie Falconer, Llandough, Penarth, Wales, UK
“It’s termite flavored too!”
– Jeffrey Angus, Ranger, Texas. USA
“Fe vampire if capfing up! Quick, fe garlic fpray!”
– Christian Hennecke
“My inhaler takes a lick’n and I keep on tick’n!”
– Jon Wilson, Lafayette, California, USA
“When I get short of breath, I just take another and keep going!”
– Yvonne “Catbunny” Pawtowski, Lynwood, Washington
“And then I squeeze the button with my ‘tongue-depressor’!”
– Nathan House, Kingston, Tasmania, Australia
“Hold on, puff puff, I’m getting my second wind!”
– Bruce Denhard, New Hampshire, USA
“I call it cloud-saucing!”
– Jenner


Mar/Apr 2017

Mar/Apr 2017 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Philip McCarty, Owens Cross Roads, Alabama, USA
“… oh yeah, I’ve seen that quack’s handiwork before.”
– J. Bern, Germany
“Looks like that tattoo artist really rooked you!”
– Julie B
“Depends. When was the last time you took a bath?”
– Josh Harrington Knight
“It could be an egg allergy. We will have to track this feather.”
– Lucy Erda, Bee Caves, Texas, USA
“The skin lesions have taken a tern for the worst.”
– M Henry, Reidsville, North Carolina, USA
“It explains the squeaking sound when you rolled onto your back.”
– Jenner
Jan/Feb caption winner

Jan/Feb 2017 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Brian Coe, Lake Stevens, Washington, USA


– Jon Wilson, Lafayette, California, USA
“Huh…  Packs a bigger wallup than I thought…”
– Dark Hammer, Ridgefield, Washington, USA
“I’d still advise against ‘packs a punch’ for the ad slogan.”
– J. Bern, Denmark
“Medical Advertising – full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”
– M. Henry, Reidsvile, North Carolina, USA
“This Boxing Day, don’t forget to take your ZAPPO!”
– Chris Mayer, League City, Texas, USA
“Not the first thing I would’ve recommended to a heart patient …”
– Josh Harrington-Knight,
“Doc’s new ‘surprise’ medication was a great cure for constipation.”
– Rob Falconer, Llandough, Wales,
“Now, that’s what I call aggressive marketing”
– Jenner
Nov/Dec 2016 Doc Rat caption competition winner

Nov/Dec 2016 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Yvonne “Catbunny” Pawtowski, of Lynwood, Washingoton, USA


“I admit that I wouldn’t /need/ that to raise my DIY nebulizer to my mouth if I hadn’t made it out of a cast iron bathtub faucet …”
 – J Bern
 “Inhale one to start squeaking, inhale the other to stop squeaking!”
 – Joseph Kesselman
 “It’s an inhaler for them that’s got no arms!”
 – Alun Rundle, Newport, South Wales, UK
 “Next month, we’re starting Drone delivery”
 – Bruce Denhard, New Hampshire, USA
“You should see the medicine cabinet!”
 – Josh H Knight, Midland, Texas, USA
“I can’t catch my breath; how do I catch my inhaler?”
 – John Whiting
“It’s exactly what it looks like: Airborne pollen protection.”
 – Jenner
Sep/Oct 2016 Doc Rat caption competition winner

Sep/Oct 2016 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Rob Falconer, of of Llandough, Wales, UK



 “How much did you say the Australian Space Research Institute are paying for the first Aussie in space, Jarrad?”
– Alun Rundle, Newport, South Wales, UK
Jenner testing cheap air transport for Uncle Kage.
– M Henry, Reidsville, North Carolina USA
“This is just a quick one today, Doc. I won’t be more than… two minutes and twenty-five seconds.”
– Jenner


Jul/Aug 2016 Doc Rat caption competition winner

Jul/Aug 2016 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Dermot McAreavy
“For the umpteenth time! Stop howling before you attack”.
“Er, right.”
– Christian Hennecke, Bochum, Germany
“That one was ‘Wipe On, Wipe Off’!”
– Josh H. Knight, Midland, Texas
“It wouldn’t be a fair fight, if I can’t tell the difference between a ‘black belt’, a ‘brown belt’ or a ‘red belt’… We wolves are ‘color blind’!”
– Jed Martinez, Margate, Florida, USA
“… I call it the peacekeeper overthrow.”
– J. Bern, Germany
 “I told you not to attack the Fourth wall, Quarrydog!”
– Alun Rundle, Newport, South Wales, UK
“Who’s the underdog now?”
– Jenner

May/Jun 2016 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Josh H. Knight of of Midland, Texas, USA

“Higher… HIGHER!  Oh for God’s sake HIGHER!  It’s CHOCOLATE!”
 – Mea, Alabama, USA

“Best guide dog ever, thought Kermit”
 – Rob Falconer, Penarth, Wales

“This is the one for you – it’s marrow-bone jelly flavour”
 – Valerie Falconer, Penarth, Wales

“Colder … colder … ice cold …”
 – J. Bern

Frog: “I see something icy!”
Dog: “Say What?”
 – Timo Steffens, Germany

“No! Stop! Doc said to avoid carbs!”
 – Sandy Skeba, Nashville, Tennessee, USA

“It’s a trap! Eat it and you will appear in a Doc Rat caption competition strip.”
 – M Henry, Reidsville, North Carolina, USA

Now THAT’S something you don’t see every day!
 – Jenner

Mar/Apr 2016 Caption Competition

The winning entry is Lucius Appaloosius of Mystic, Connecticut, USA

“But Dad, this is the third one that broke! Can’t we just get the Kevlar one, like Mum said?”
– Eleanor, Ballan, Victoria, Australia
 “Please fix my horse Doc.  We were just swimming alone when he ran out of steam!”
– Rebecca Swanston, Vancouver, Washington, USA
 “I thought this was supposed to be puncture proof.”
– J Rhine, USA
“Now I see why Sonic doesn’t like going near water!”
– Phil McCarty, Gaithersburg, Maryland, USA
“I was hoping to get a ‘swimming buddy’, but no one wants to come near me… I don’t know why!”
– Jed G. Martinez, Margate, Florida, USA
“So it’s not soft water, then?”
– Jenner


Nov-Feb 2016 Caption Competition winner

The winning entry is Josh H Knight, of Midland, Texas, USA


“Phil was impressed by the new trainees’ desire to work – not everyone volunteered to hold the flip calendar.” 
Alun Rundle, Newport, South Wales, UK
“The Doc’ gave me thith prethcripthion againtht my lithp, but I don’t think it’th working.”
Tiger T
“Can you calculate the total for me?  I’m a cobra, not an adder.”
Melkior, Victoria, Australia
“Well, the bill seems OK, but you know I’m a lousy adder”
Valerie Falconer, Penarth, Wales, UK
“I was told this is to detoxify my body. Is that safe??”
Max Goof, Dublin, Ohio, USA
“Prescription for Aricept … fangs for the memories…”
Tristan Black Wolf, Syracuse, New York, USA
“I wanted to pick up a few fang-you notes.”
John Reynolds, Concord, California, USA
“It’th right on the tip of my tongue…”
Michelle Gaudette, Medway, Massachusetts, USA
“Please tell me I’m immune to my own poison! I bit my tongue when I saw your bill!”
Phil McCarty
“I bit my tongue.”
Timmie, Winston, Salem, North Carolina, USA
“Our secretary’s real near-sighted, you see. So there I was by the stapler …”
Dave Neil, Idaho Falls, Idaho
“Ith to help control my lipth.”
Kim Squire, Scarborough, Ontario, Canada
“It’s a layoff notice. Jenner is replacing the cartoon.”
M Henry, Reidsville, North Carolina, USA
“…for a course of  small-squealing-rodent replacement  patches.” 

May/Oct 2014 Caption Competition

The winner: Dave Neil, Idaho Falls, USA


“The cat in the hat comes back — with a vengeance!”
– Deckard Canine, Washington, DC, USA

“I’ll wave my magic wand and—no more babies!”
– Jim Lane, St. Augustine, Florida, USA

“Hey, Rocky! Watch me pull a tonsil out of my hat!”
– Phatchick, Appleton, Wisconsin, USA

“Surgery is like magic. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t.”
– Jeffrey Angus, Ranger, Texas, USA

“No strip today. Doc Rat is in hiding from the Doc Slasher.”
– :M Henry, Franklin, Tennessee, USA

“And now, for my next trick…. I’m gonna remove your spleen!”
– Kim Squire, Scarborough, Ontario, Canada

“For my next trick, I’ll make your tonsils disappear!”
– Jeremy Ryan, Somerville, MA, USA

“The name’s Scalpell. Speculum Scalpell. Secret Agent 8-1/2. My sidekick, Inspector 86, left a note here somewhere.”
– DaveBro, Atlanta, Georgia, USA

“Would you believe that before I took that correspondence course in plastic surgery I used to be a rabbit?”
– Simcha-Yitzchak Lerner, Oak Park, Michigan, USA

“Anesthesia? No, abracadabra!”
– Arthur McBain, Kennewick, Washington, USA

“For my next trick, I’ll get your tongue!”
– Jon Wilson, Livermore, California, USA

“And soon you’ll meet my brother – he’s the catgut.”
– Jenner



Mar/Apr 2014 Caption Competition

The winner: Alexandra Weingartner, Monterey, USA


“OK, I may look like something out of Star Wars, but please stop calling me Jabber.”
– Valerie Falconer, Penarth, Wales

“I find inoculations ribbiting, don’t you, Doc?”
– Robert Adrian, Conway, New Hampshire, USA

“Let’s inject some humor back into Doc Rat.”
– M Henry, : Franklin, Tennessee, USA
[I get the point. Jenner]

“And ‘I’ thought I could jump!!!”
– Jimmy Lapine, Tampa, Florida, USA

“Look doc…just between you and me, this is a tad too big.”
– Daniel Thwaites, Firth Park, UK

“…But if you DON’T take this injection, we’ll BOTH croak—“
– Jim Lane, St Augustine, Florida, USA

“I’m here to kiss it and make it all better. Now bend over…”
– Timmie, North Carolina, USA

“Well, Doc, I dunno about you, but I can dodge this all day.”
– Dan Ball Jr., Springfield, Oregon, USA

“Needle lift? Hop on.”
– Alyse Miller, Orlando, Florida, USA

“We really shouldn’t needle him like this…”
Sandy, Nashville. Tennessee, USA

“Sorry, Doc, I get jumpy around needles.”
– Sam Schmern, Duncan, British Columbia, Canada

“I don’t know, I hear the side effects include unwanted hair growth.”
– Sleepy John, Concord, California, USA

“He doesn’t need a shot for a frog in his throat. Just send down a lifeline.”
– Josh Morris, East Alton, Illinois, USA

“Just ignore me. I’m the medical student.”
– Jenner

Nov/Dec 2013 Caption Competition

The winner: Jeremy Ryan, Somerville, USA


“Happy Birthday Miss. Beaver!”
– Gerald Johnston, Alvin, Texas, USA

“I’m so Sorry Mrs. Pachyderm, I didn’t realize you’re allergic to fruit cake.”
– Larry Edgett, Torrance, California, USA

– Glenn Payne, Coogee, Western Australia, Australia

“It’s just what you asked for: an ex-box.”
– Jenner


Sept/Oct 2013 Caption Competition

The winner: Abel DuSable, Winnipeg, Canada


“What does he mean, no light snacks between meals?”
– Curtis Hoffmann, Kagoshima, Japan

“Doc, about this light diet you put me on…”
– Phil McCarty, Brownsboro, Alabama, USA

“I’m eating them because Mum said she wished she had a brighter child”
– Paul Sanders, Heathmont, Victoria, Australia

“This isn’t how I brighten my smile?”
– Lynn Kurtz, Castaic Lake, California, USA

“Watts the big deal?”
– Dave Caspari, Ventura, California USA

“I thought they were the bulbs you can EAT!”
– Chris Smith

“Tonight the shocking conclusion”
– CBFox

“munch munch Mewwy Chwithmath!!! Munch”
– Astrid Jekat, Munich, Germany

“I REALLY wish I’d left the tree end ‘til last!”
– Jenner

May/June 2013 Competition

The winner: John Reynolds, Concord, California, USA


“I wanted face painting not a nose job!!!”
– Bill Chapman, West Perth, Western Australia. Australia

“I told you, no thanks, I’m an Anteater, not a Painteater.”
– Crookedwolf, Nashville, Tennessee, USA

“I don’t care if you are an artist, French kiss me again and I’ll be adding frog legs to my ant diet!”
– Merlin, Tornado Alley, USA

“Ugh! You have painted me all wrong, my nose is really NOT that big”
– Meagan Ellerton, Queensland, Australia

“You might have told me they were plastic ant models. I hope they weren’t made in China.”
– Jaime, Rochester, Minnesota, USA

“And who do you think you are, Toad? Saliva-dor Dali?”
– Jon Wilson, Lafayette, California, USA

“Will you just try ants for once? Your ad said ‘Likes bugs, broad palette.’”
– Jesse Henning, San Francisco, California, USA

“What has good taste — and sounds like a bell?”
– W. Reid Ripley, Port Hueneme, California USA

“Only an artist can create great Doc Rat captions.”
– M Henry, Franklin, Tennessee, USA

“You call this a Monet-back guarantee?”
– Jenner

March/April 2013 Competition

The winner: Jeanne Skadowski, Olean, New York, USA

Special Mentions:

“I’ve got to improve my speed… Rumor has it that that the tortoise is going ‘turbo’!”
– Jed G. Martinez, Margate, Florida, USA

“This year I’m going to beat that turtle.”
– John Fischer, Cameron North Carolina, USA

“My iPhone charger, why?”
– Colin, Metairie, Louisiana, USA

“Laugh all you want, this thing charges my cell phone in five minutes!”
– Flynn Leek, Davis, California, USA

“Believe it or not, this’s cheaper than most running shoes!”
– Josh H. Knight, Midland, Texas

“Yeah Doc, you’re right, I am a big fan.”
– Curtis Hoffmann, Kagoshima, Japan

“This does NOT make me an airhead.”
– Jeremy Ryan, Somerville, Massachusetts, USA

“I don’t think this is what they mean when they say ‘hop a flight’..”
– Erich Eichner, Waltham, Massachusetts, USA

“That rabbit-proof fence won’t stand a chance!”
– Josh H. Knight, Midland, Texas

“It´s a hare dryer.”
– Jim Smart, Cairns, Far North Queensland, Australia

“Fly away Hare.”
– Michael Brown, London, Ontario Canada

“So, which way to O’Hare airport?”
– Atkelar, Austria

“Never ask a hard of hearing doctor for an “exercise induced asthma treatment with a propellant.”
– Glenn Payne, Coogee, Western Australia, Australia

“I’m following a meerkat on a unicycle!”
– Jenner